Back and Forth: The Art of Turning Pages

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Scott Carney: I finished reading through my stack Friday night.  Here I am on Monday night, kicking it with Mitt and Barack, still struggling to feel something for these books.  To try to kick-start a feeling, I peeled back a few pages of Daredevil #19.  Here’s a book that has taken on an odd tone of late.  Gone is the good time, and squatting in its place is one serious second after another–save for a pair of panels that find Daredevil, well, squatting in a warehouse with a clothespin on his nose in order to save his suped-up sense of smell from the stench of the garage in which he’s staked out.  I heaped a hefty “HA!” in that spot, one heralding the arrival of vicious version of The Spot: Coyote–who’s at least one step ahead of DD.  Is there something silly about Matt’s cellphone conversation with Foggy?  Sure.  It culminates in a fantastic fall and a calm “Call you back,” whipped up wittily by Mark Waid, Chris Samnee, and Javier Rodriguez.  That dance, however, is dampened by the danger–by the descent into madness that rules the book as a whole.  I did dig the dialogue between Foggy and Kirstin despite its doubling down on the seriousness of the storyline.  I think it’s worth noting that Samnee and Rodriguez do a fearless job of bringing Waid’s complex interdimensional fight scene to the page.  It took me a few reads to really appreciate it, but appreciate it I do.  Spot on, boys!  Can’t wait to see what’s ne–

Derek Mainhart: Sounds like you ended up enjoying it more than you initially thought! After the dark terrain of the last couple of issues, I definitely felt this was a return to form. The culprit behind DD’s recent woes was revealed, and if the answer was a bit underwhelming (a throwaway villain from the first issue), Waid’s creative exploration of his Tex Avery superpower was alternately farcical and chilling. I’d also like to commend Waid’s command of pacing here. He’s one of a very few writers (Grant Morrison comes to mind) who understands how the physical structure of a comic book can enhance the experience of reading it. The cell phone scene you mention is a perfect example. The danger is set up perfectly on page 2. Then you have to turn the page for the unexpected, laugh-out-loud punchline.

Since we’re discussing arcane comic book points, a similar thing happens in Batwoman #13. The plot is negligible; Wonder Woman and Batwoman have teamed up to find Medusa for some reason. Whatever; in this book the story exists for J.H. Williams III to hang his art on. I feel like every time we review Batwoman, I just go on about how gorgeous the art is. Well this review is no exception. The visuals are unbelievable (colorist extraordinaire Dave Stewart deserves mentioning here as well). The beat I’m referring to begins on pages 11-12, as Wonder Woman, unseen, is bound and trapped in pitch blackness (also featured is some bravura lettering by Todd Klein – everyone gets their due in this review!). The layout of this two-page spread is absolutely claustrophobic. I’ve never experienced anything quite like it. And then the page turn and the abrupt transition from suffocating dark to blinding light  – I swear you’ll need sunglasses. Another favorite: the two-page spread on pages 4-5 (only Williams can justify a book full of ’em!) as our heroines traverse an underground labyrinth. The bird’s eye view, revealing the complexity of the thing, is a stunner. I literally tried to fold it like an Al Jaffee fold-in from Mad Magazine, sure there was some hidden image (even after several unsuccessful attempts, I still kinda think there’s one). Buy it and gawk.

And yet for all of that, this was not the most eye-grabbing art in my pile this week. That honor goes to The Zaucer of Zilk #1 (IDW / 2000AD). Check out this cover:

Doesn’t do it justice. I’m telling you, as I perused the usual fare on the shelves, this thing was pulsing. When I snapped out of its ocular enchantment, I found that a copy had jumped into my hands. And a good thing too. Where to begin? It starts with your basic Alice in Wonderland escape from reality, then promptly turns this conceit on its head. From there we follow the Zaucer (the titular hero, sort of) through realms dripping with surreality; candy-colored fantasy lands teeming with psychedelic absurdity,

SC: I believe the word is “trippy.”

DM: Yeah, I guess, but I have to say I’ve never been one for the hippy-dippy aesthetic. I hold that the late sixties through the early seventies is the ugliest era on record. All garish colors and no discipline. But here, the art by Brendan McCarthy, gives a refined form to the hallucinatory proceedings. There is both tension and balance between his fine-lined drawings and the Day-Glo colors an tie-dyed backgrounds (supplied by Mr. McCarthy and Len O’Grady – again the colorists are vital to the book). It’s like Yellow Submarine as drawn by Frank Quitely (indeed the villain owes more than a little to the Blue Meanies). The script by Al Ewing (from a story by he and Mr. McCarthy) shares a similar quality. All of the introductory story beats are hit; introduction of characters, conflict and quest. But the florid language disguises the traditional narrative workings with a fanciful, anarchic tone that is distinctly British in its cultivated nonsense. Here’s a sample as the not-quite-helpless damsel finds herself in the gloomy realm of Dankendreer:

“Rain dribbles into grey plastic buckets. Paper-mache people slump over cobwebbed continental breakfasts. Poor Tutu. She should have stayed in the Guest Room.”

(The spasmodic contrast between the dark and light realms is exactly what was missing from the first issue of Happy!) As the title itself suggests Ewing deals in wordplay, which runs the gamut from groaning puns to sublime silliness (my personal favorite – his take on “fancy pants” –  I want a pair!) He even manages to break the fourth wall in a way that is relatively understated and actually makes sense within the framework of the story, which shines a fun-house mirror on our TMZ / OCD culture. Now all of this does run the risk of becoming wearying in the long run. But this first issue, with its wild invention, expansive scope and off-kilter storytelling takes its place alongside Brian K. Vaughan’s Saga, China Mieville’s Dial H and (yes, I’ll say it) Ryan North’s Adventure Time, as invigorating examples of craft and imagination. Truly a breath of fresh air in the comic book world. Book of the Week. Book of the Week. Book of the Week.

SC: But how did you really feel about it? Now, let’s see, what else moved me?  Well, if you’ve read my Scottlight on: Swamp Thing #0 post, you know how much I love a good head chompin’.  And there, in Wonder Woman #13, two pages in, there it is, in the final panel: a little noggin noshin’.  For one reason or another, that’s where my joy–and my enjoyment of the book–was chewed up and swallowed away.  I’m not sure it’s tied to anything Brian Azzarello has done; he’s certainly pushing his story along well enough.  I think I felt let down by Tony Akins’ inconsistent artwork.  I mean, did you notice the last panel on page 21?  Gotta wonder about that woman.

Neither Harbinger #5 nor X-O Manowar #6 did it for me this go-round.  Ink and color me a bit nervous about the Valiant books, especially with the new titles on the horizon.

In Ultimate Spider-Man #16, Brian Michael Bendis makes a clear-cut case for a costume-free Miles Morales–for an Ultimate Miles Morales on-going, which would undoubtedly be superior to anything Marvel’s putting out NOW!

DM: Regarding this issue’s focus on blah super hero shenanigans, I must point to my review of the previous issue of USM – I told you so! Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I pulled something whilst patting myself on the back. Where’s that ointment?….

In Scott’s Bag (10/24)

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My comics were held hostage over night, but I was able to liberate them with a kind word and a couple of bucks.

A Bag of One

  • Justice League Dark #13 (Jeff Lemire’s tweeting it up, and I’m eating it up.)

Justice League Dark #13 Cover

Pick My Knows

  • The Flash #13 (I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m done with The Flash–after this issue.)
  • Batman Incorporated #4 (Keep putting off having it pulled.  Must be the dollop of doubt; I mean, where’s this thing headed?)
  • Wolverine Max #1 (Thumbed through.  Could be a one and done.)

Used a twenty; had enough left over for dinner.  Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about.

What did you get in your bag?

Turning pages,

Scott

What’s Up?

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I’m almost embarrassed to reveal my list for the week.  Almost.

Gimme Morrison

  • Batman Incorporated #4: My wish has been granted!

It’s No Secret

  • Justice League Dark #13: Two houses, both alike in clandestineness…

Snikt Decision

  • Wolverine MAX #1: I’ve enjoyed Fury Max enough.  Maybe this is worth a try.

Grod Darn It!

  • The Flash #13: Haven’t missed an issue yet.  Been thinking about ditching for a few issues.  Might not be able to–with Grodd and all.

The Flash #13 Cover

It’s a pretty small week pour moi.  But we all know: it’s not the size of the stack; it’s the action under the covers.

Which books are you looking forward to tomorrow?

Turning pages,

Scott

Back and Forth: DC Won!

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Derek Mainhart: Well here we are closing in on Halloween, but for comics, the summer-style blockbusters from the Big Two keep on comin’. I guess I should start with the one I actually read.

Batman #13 – The Joker? Issue 13? Perfect set up for some Halloween frights. If only it were just that; but this much-hyped return of Batman’s nemesis is also the next epic crossover. Having just come off the whole Court of the Owls storyline (which was largely excellent) I must admit to feeling a little epic-fatigue. I do wish this was contained solely within Scott Snyder’s Batman instead of spread out across the whole Bat-family (not that I intend to buy all the other issues). Having said that, Snyder gets things off to a solid start. We get all the classic Joker beats in one issue: Joker assaults a police station? Check. Joker stages an elaborate, announced plan to kill a public official? Check. Joker lures Batman into an over-the-top deathtrap? Check. Having cleansed his palette, we can assume Snyder will be off and running with some new wrinkles next issue right? He certainly hints at it. He seems to be setting up a bigger, badder Joker. Harley Quinn spells it out: “He’s not the same Bats. He’s not my Mr. J. anymore…” I suppose this is tied into the whole getting-his-face ripped-off thing from Detective #1. (This begs the question: whose idea was that? Tony Daniel’s? The editors’? Or was Snyder setting this current story up a year ago?) But really, how much more twisted can the Joker get? Is Snyder suggesting that this version is somehow more monstrous than the Joker of Alan Moore’s character-defining turn in The Killing Joke? Trying to make this character more extreme seems to be just a way to fulfill the parameters of an “epic event”. Why not just give us an awesome Joker story? But, like I said, there’s much to like. The story-telling by Greg Capullo and Jonathan Glapion is excellent. Most of all, Snyder really excels at developing an underlying sense of dread through the entire book (his mastery at this was established in Severed (published by Image) which was practically an exercise in keeping your skin crawling over seven issues. The best horror book of recent memory. Get the trade for Halloween.) Speaking of which, how about that back-up? I only wish we could have read that before the events in the lead story!

I’ll let you handle the honors on this week’s other blockbuster: Uncanny Avengers #1.

Uncanny Avengers #1

Scott Carney: Oh, joy.  Your generosity knows no limits!  Must be your mutant ability.  For the record: I’m looking at Batman #13 as I would the first ten or so pages of The Great Gatsby–which means, in my mind’s monotone: “Now that that’s done with, let’s get on with the good stuff.”  Like you said: the back-up was pretty sweet–like cyanide.  Damn thing should’ve been part of the story proper.

OK.  I’ve put the “honors” you so benevolently bequeathed to me off long enough.

Now, I know you didn’t read UA #1, which is why you’ve lobbed it over to my side of the net.  But I’ll tell you all you need to know by analyzing one page: page one.  Picture this:

First panel: an eye held open a la the brainwashing scene of Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange; glowing in the iris is Cyclops as the Phoenix.  Speech bubble: an unknown spouting anti-mutant babble.

Second panel: zooming out, we  see two eyes held open a la the aforementioned a la, a trickle of blood between them, and some more babble, rousing some rabble about “evolution” and “competition”–which, interestingly enough, put me in a certain mind.

Third panel: the voice gains a scalpel-wielding hand, which is slicing into the exposed brain of the now Phoenix-free eye guy.  As unnamed character–he of the hand–blathers about the world’s having “felt the mutant boot on its neck”; and I was like, “Mr. Remender, you’re talking about AvX, aren’t you?”

Fourth panel: the voice digs itself deeper into a villainous vat of nonsense as its two hands pull part of the poor fella’s–the eye guy’s–brain out of his head.  And I was like, “Mr. Remender, you’re crafting the perfect Marvel fan, aren’t you?”

Fifth panel: the voice–now clearly Remender, in my mind, anyway–hops into a heap of “hatred[, which] protects a [comic company, like Marvel] from complacency in the face of [its more successful] rivals[, clearly DC].”  As he does, he shoves some device into the empty space in the eye guy’s head.

And that device, my friend, is Marvel NOW!

What a way to begin this glorious new initiative: with Remender’s mocking Marvel readers by making them out to be an easily-led legion of lobotomized zombies–zombies willing to buy into the reactionary ReEVOLUTION, which, apparently, isn’t much of a revolution at all.  In fact, according to Axel Alonso, Marvel’s editor-in-chief: “The only change is some subtle tweaks to some costumes.”  Indeed!

Phew.  I’m exhausted after that.  I’ll leave the rest to you!

DM: Yeah, dude.  Take a deep breath–or a nap or something.

I’ll jump into another book tying in to a crossover event is Frankenstein: Agent of Shade #13. This book also pairs well with our October fright-fest, as our favorite, tragic zipper-neck gets knee-deep in the Rot from the current Animal Man/Swamp Thing epic. Tie-ins like this are usually superfluous and best-avoided. And truly, nothing integral to the Rotworld story seems to happen in this issue. But not picking it up would mean depriving yourself of the stirrings of undead/amphibian love! Frankie riding a talking horse through post-apocalyptic Metropolis! And Matt Kindt’s freewheeling revisiting of Mary Shelley’s Modern Prometheus with Daddy issues! In terms of the larger story, this issue is indeed tangential and probably unnecessary. It is also one more thing: wildly entertaining.

Archer and Armstrong #3 may not be part of any crossover event, but with its globetrotting antics and millennia-spanning conspiracies, it sure feels like a blockbuster (and a pretty one too, as drawn by Clayton Henry and Pere Perez). But no mindless action spectacle this. The swordplay and martial arts are merely dressing for the big ideas that Fred Van Lente is playing with here (no surprise from a scribe who co-created a comic called Action Philosophers). Van Lente is an interesting, idiosyncratic writer; conversant in popcorn archetypes, he exploits them to plumb deeper thematic territory. If he has a weakness, it’s that his character’s reactions sometimes seem unearned. Archer’s about-face rejection of his lifelong indoctrination doesn’t ring true. And Armstrong’s response to the killing of a character he calls “the best woman I’ve known for ten thousand years” is simply “Bastards.”  Still, this is fascinating stuff. The rollicking action and effortless odd-couple, cop-buddy banter make a breezy read out of what is, after all, a thoroughly-researched satire about nothing less than the nature of faith.

SC: You know, that’s exactly what I was gonna say!

Turning pages,

Derek & Scott

In Scott’s Bag (10/17)

A smaller haul than I had hoped, but hey: I’ve got me some good readin’ within reach.  Just need a minute of your time–and a million others like you–because I ain’t go enough of my own.

Baguette

  • Daredevil #19 (Yay!  More Samnee!)

Daredevil #19 Cover

  • Ultimate Spider-Man #16 (I didn’t know what to expect from Larraz; but after a few flips, it’s clear: he ain’t a spaz.  Wonderin’ how much I’m gonna like a Miles-in-costume adventure.  In Bendis I trust–even with that damn banner on the side of the cover.)
  • Wonder Woman #13 (Darn it!  Another artist change!)
  • Harbinger #5 (I’m psyched!)
  • X-O Manowar #6 (Oh no!  Ninjak!)

Baby Girl’s Pick of the Week

  • Peanuts #3 (We’re all caught up!  Yay!)

M.I.A.

  • Batwoman #13 (Reordered.)
  • Rocketeer: Cargo of Doom #3 (Not shipped?)

Maybe someday I’ll have time to read ’em!

What did you get in your bag?

Turning pages–sooner or later,

Scott

What’s Up?

I’ve barely had time to breathe.  Here’s a mighty inhalation:

Oxygen Tank

  • Batwoman #13
  • Wonder Woman #13
  • Rocketeer: Cargo of Doom #3
  • Daredevil #19
  • Ultimate Spider-Man #16
  • Harbinger #5
  • X-O Manowar #6

What are you looking forward to?

Turning pages,

Scott

 

 

In Scott’s Bag (10/10)

I opened my bag and bing, bang, boom, suddenly I found myself in the ’90s.

The Gift of Bag

  • Batman #13 (Let’s face it: the cover’s unnecessary.  Here’s to hoping it isn’t meant to mask a muddled mess.)
  • Frankenstein: Agent of S.H.A.D.E. #13 (“Hrrrm,” indeed.)
  • Archer and Armstrong #3 (Yay!!)
  • Bloodshot #4 (Bloody yay!)

Bloodshot #4 Cover

  • Wolverine and the X-Men #18 (Officially the last AvX tie-in!)

Secret Mark

  • Secret Service #4 (I had forgotten all about this.  Here’s a secret: when this series is done, I’ll make sure to forget about Millar’s World.)

A Flaming Bag of…

  • Suicide Squad #13 (I had forgotten to turn in my new pull-list; you know, the one without Suicide Squad.)

Pluck It

  • Uncanny Avengers #1 (Now, I just had to try it.  Right?  I mean, didn’t you?)

Baby’s Pick of the Week

  • Peanuts #2 (She liked #1 so much–or seemed to, anyway.)

What did you get in your bag?

Turning pages,

Scott

Back and Forth: Dialed In

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Scott Carney: Where to start, where to start?  I know where I’m not going to start; I know where I’m not going to go period: to AvX #12 or Rorschach #2.  Each reads like a refund.

I guess I’ll start with a couple of books that were rotten as a rule: Swamp Thing #13 and Animal Man #13.  Mirror images of one another, these two books build the foundation for Rotworld–the former focused on the Green, and the latter, its locus, the Red.  Even though the stories follow almost identical arcs, in round one (as if this is a boxing match between flora and fauna), I’ve got to give the edge to the walking compost heap.  Scott Snyder’s story grows a bit more organically; and Yanick Paquette’s art–especially the layouts–is at its series best.  In terms of where each ends–a decided difference, indeed–it’s an absolute fact: I’m more interested in Abigail’s fate than I am in Ellen’s.  I’m pretty sure Abby’s not dead, despite what the Parliament professes; but I’d still like to see how the situation plays out.

Derek Mainhart: I had a mirrored reaction to yours: I liked Animal Man better. The endangerment of Buddy’s family seemed to raise the stakes higher than in Swamp Thing (though I could have done without the return of Shepherd, the Red’s answer to Jar Jar Binks). But then it almost seems odd to contrast the two books, since they really are different chapters of the same story. I admire the level of craft going into the writing, as the books are nearly symmetrical; a level of synergy rarely seen in crossovers. “Organic” applies in every sense of the word.

SC: Thanks to the last two pages of Daredevil: End of Days #1, I’m pretty sure I don’t know if Daredevil’s a dead devil or not.  I mean, the dude should be dead: Murdock’s murdered in full view of a mob of indecent flashers; and it’s the mob of Awful Samaritans’ impotent images that bring the bloody end game to life, providing the proof of Bullseye’s coring of ol’ Hornhead.  So who the hell is that at the end?  Does the Hand have a hand in this?  (I deserve a high-five for that one!)  The big four hands involved with putting this tale together have crafted something graphic and gritty: Klaus Janson and Bill Sienkiewicz deliver on the viscerals–I mean, visuals; and Brian Michael Bendis bends DD backward–essentially turning a blind eye to what Waid’s doing right now on Marvel’s best book, hands down–toward the the darker tone of his own successful run on Daredevil (Vol. 2).  Where’s David Mack’s hand in all of this?  It’s not where I was hoping it would be, that’s for sure.  I guess this storyline isn’t exactly where I was hoping it would be, either: it seems to rest outside of continuity.

DM: Yeah this seems superfluous. It read like “What If…..Brian Michael Bendis continued writing Daredevil????” It’s a shame because the ending that Benids did supply to his run was just perfect. I was also expecting some David Mack art. As it was, the art seemed as muddled as the story. Klaus Janson is a wonderful artist, but generally stronger as an inker in my view. Bullseye? The Kingpin? In light of Waid’s current, excellent work, this reads like a re-run.

SC: Even still, I’m prepared to give it another issue or two.  I mean, I was down on the idea of Spider-Men, and, boy, did I end up with web on my face with that one!  Time to dial up the expectations!

Dial H #5 certainly lived up to expectations–expectations that were sky high after a dialed in #0.  China Mieville continues to untangle the wires, allowing us to learn along with Nelson about his dial–one without a phone, without a booth; one he dials while calling on “a Superman.”  Even Superman, however, couldn’t have seen this one coming: Cock-a-Hoop?  I was cock-a-hoop myself as I witnessed this next round of wackiness, this epic battle–drawn up epically by Mateus Santolouco–that leaves some victims in its wake and presents a new challenge for our hero and his elderly sidekick Manteau.

DM: I still can’t believe this freak show of a comic is a DC book. The New 52 can be marked a success if for nothing else than this book’s existence. Mieville’s writing, though occasionally hard to follow, is never less than inspired. To wit: “When nothing eats nothing? It leaves anti-nothing behind. Somethingness.” Brilliant? Claptrap? Whatever man, I’m lovin’ the ride.

SC: Indeed. Mieville’s got it goin’ on–and he knows it: as Nelson remarks on how the shadow “used its dial…like it’s supposed to be used,” Mielville slyly whispers that he’s writing comics like they’re supposed to be written–that he’s writing them like Grant Morrison on Action Comics.

Action Comics #13 Cover

Action Comics #13 certainly doesn’t–it couldn’t possibly–meet the otherworldly standard set by #0.  It does, however, have an exciting–if not slightly confusing–reimagining of the Phantom Zone, with phantastic art from Travel Foreman, who set a phreakin’ high bar over on The New 52’s Animal Man–one not yet met, despite some good work from Steve Pugh et al.

DM: It was good to see Foreman’s work again. He does a nice job. But given the sparsity of the interdimensional setting, I think the colorist, Brad Anderson, deserves a lot of the credit for the overall look of the book.

SC: Noted.  But what really struck me–what drew a tear of joy from me–was the page turn from page 23 to 24: there’s Krypto, who “waited and waited for what felt like a thousand years–for Kal-El, his Kal-El, [I’m tearing up just typing this] had promised he would return”; and–turn the page–wouldn’t you know, “Kal-El never broke a promise.”  No, he doesn’t break promises.  That’s what makes him Superman.  That’s what makes us love him–whether we’re 9 or 90.

DM: Don’t hold back man! It’s ok! I’m right there with you. Morrison, more than any writer in recent memory, knows what a Superman story is supposed to be. Month-to-month continuity concerns, cosmetic changes, new villains, etc.; all of that is secondary. Superman exists for the big, goose-bump inducing, awe-inspiring moments. And that’s what we get here.

SC: Morrison is making magic–and is conjuring up a showdown with Mr. Mxyzptlk to prove it–which makes his impending exit all the more difficult to deal with.  Maybe if we get him to say his name backwards…

Turning pages,

Scott & Derek

What’s Up?

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Tuesday?  Already?

A Writer’s Dozen

  • Batman #13: Snyder plus Joker equals sold.

Batman #13 Cover

  • Frankenstein: Agent of S.H.A.D.E. #13: Yes, we Kindt!

Valiants Marching

  • Archer & Armstrong #3
  • Bloodshot #4

My Golden Calf

  • Wolverine and the X-Men #18: I’m just going to believe.  Not trust.  Believe.

For NOW!

  • Uncanny Avengers #1: Why the hell not?  It’s not like I have to sign a contract or anything.

Millar’s Time

  • Secret Service #4: Once this series is done with, I think I’ll be done with Millar.

What are you looking forward to tomorrow?

Turning pages,

Scott

In Scott’s Bag (10/3)

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This may be the first week where I left the store with everything I expected to leave with.  That’s right: if you’ve been keeping up, you know that means my bones and my skin were overridden.

Big Star

  • Action Comics #13 (I hope this isn’t just a mini-vacation for Travel Foreman.  Looks gorgeous.)
  • Animal Man #13 (What the heck happened to Hawkman?  Holy crap!  Does this mean Rob Liefeld is the avatar of the Rot?)

Animal Man #13 Cover

  • Swamp Thing #13 (The layouts look lovely.)

Twelve Inch

  • Dial H #5 (Cock-a-Hoop?  I gotta get me some of whatever Mieville’s taking.)

By the way: Hate–absolutely HATE!–the Arrow banner that cuts across the covers.

Limited Serious

  • Daredevil: End of Days #1 (I can’t imagine a reality in which I won’t like this.)

On a Short Leash

  • Fatale #8 (Needs to pick it up a bit–with a new twist or something; otherwise, it might get pulled off the pull-list.)

Shruggin’ So Hard I Pulled a Trap

  • Rorschach #2 (Might be an improvement over #1.  Might.)
  • AvX #12 (The Architects might’ve saved the best for la—  Sorry.  I can’t keep a straight face.  And that always prevents me from typing the word la—  Darn it.  Still soooo not straight.)

I’d say I can’t wait to get into ’em, but I am waiting–against my will, sure; but I’m waiting, nevertheless.  Hmm.  Maybe by using all this wait, maybe I’m losing wait.  I wonder what’ll happen when I lose it all.  No: I know: I’ll be terribly intolerable, which means I won’t have to go and buy new pants–’cause the old ones’ll fit just fine.

What did you get in your bag?

Turning pages,

Scott